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Crooky Testdrives Six Compact Cars In Three Days
By crooky | May 16, 2008
There comes a time in a self-employed persons’ life when the family car is no longer cutting it for a business vehicle. As much as I love my car (see pic below), the following things have changed in my life recently:
1. I am on the road more and more because my business is growing.
2. My wife just got her driver’s license and with our third child on the way, she can no longer rely on transit to get around.
3. With my car only getting 19 MPG, the price of gas ($1.35/litre today) means I’m easily spending $300/month on gas.
4. I actually spend a lot of time that I could be working driving my wife and kids places during the work day. I can no longer afford the time.
Besides, even if a new car runs me $500/month for lease payments, insurance and gas, it takes less than a day per month of billable hours saved to justify the expense.
Without further ado, here’s the rundown of the cars I’m going to test-drive this weekend:
1. The Nissan Versa
This is the smallest car that Nissan currently offers. It was featured prominently in Season 1 of Heroes. It’s touted as having the largest cargo capacity in its class (whatever that means).
My pre-test drive expectations:
Back when I had a 1991 Volvo 740 sedan, I had to take it to a bodyshop for some work and the courtesy car they gave me was Nissan’s previous entry-level car - the Nissan Micra. I picked my wife up at the Skytrain and she could barely get in the car, she was laughing so hard. The steering wheel was about the size of DVD and so were the wheels. I couldn’t sit up straight in the thing so I was all hunched over to boot.
If this car gives me the ability to move time and space (like Hiro), all will be forgiven.
2. The Toyota Yaris
This is the car that I’ve been the most excited about test-driving. I think it’s a cute little car. This car is a second generation model, replacing the much uglier (in my opinion) Echo in 2005. This car also qualifies for a Government of Canada EcoRebate of $1000. I see lots of these things around town being driven by couriers - that’s a sign of quality to me. If couriers like them, it’s probably a good car.
My pre-test drive expectations:
I like the looks of this car but I have a feeling it’s the car that I won’t fit into. It looks small. Too small. I’ve never seen anyone my size driving one of these.
3. The Hyundai Accent
The third generation Hyundai accent is purported to be on par in terms of quaility and feel with the much more expensive Honda Civic. It’s not the prettiest car in the world but it’s cheap.
My pre-test drive expectations:
It makes me laugh that I’m even going to test one of these. When I was a teenager, Hyundai’s were absolute shit boxes. My sister completely killed her roommate’s first generation Accent by driving it offroad at the local sandflats. I know that Hyundai build quality is now supposed to be on-par with Honda but I don’t know if that means Honda has slipped or Hyundai has improved. Most of the reviews I’ve seen for these cars say “wow! Great value… for the money” or “gritty, real driving feel”. If I get this car, it’s nickname is going to be Gritty Shitty Bang Bang.
4. The Honda Fit
The enthusastic salesman at my local Honda dealership assures me that this car, introduced to Canada in the 2007 model year, is made for big guys like me. While the looks are a bit cartoony, it’s a Honda so the build quality is probably pretty good. It’s been available in Japan since 2001.
My pre-test drive expectations:
I really don’t like the way this car looks so it has some sucking up to do. I’ve read that it’s a very fun car to drive. It’d better be.
5. The Suzuki SX4
The Suzuki SX4 was developed by Suzuki and Fiat! Okay. I know Fiats aren’t know for being great cars but they sure look cool! The SX4 is the only car on my list with available all-wheel drive. I’m definitely going to try that but that option takes the fuel economy down to about 25 MPG. This car won the Consumer Guide Subcompact Showdown in 2007, beating out the Honda Fit for the #1 spot. This impressed me. It’s purported to be a very solid car that’s fun to drive.
My pre-test drive expectations:
I’m expecting that I’ll love this car the most but I’ll have quandries about buying it. I’m going to want to get the AWD version and that’s going to put the lease payments into a range that I’m not comfortable with and the gas mileage will only be marginally better than my Magnum.
6. The Volkswagen City Golf
This is actually an old car that’s been brought back from the scrap heap for a new market. The 2008 City Golf is the same as the 1997-2005 Golf (Mk4). When the Golf got updated in 2006 to the Mk5, they continued to make the Mk4 in South America for the Canadian market. It’s not availabe in the US.
My pre-test drive expectations:
I’ve never driven a VW but I was the passenger in a Mk4 Golf many times and while it’s not a big car, it’s comfortable. I’m anticipating this to be a good test drive. I’m a little nervous about the fact that this car is made in Brazil but… we’ll see.
My testing regime will be as follows:
1. Do I fit in it comfortably/can I see myself staying comfortable for as much as 4 hours in a day?
2. Is there a place for my coffee?
3. Does it have a aux hookup for my iPod?
4. Can I fit a bunch of stuff in the back (eg. several hundred text books or a small filing cabinet?)
5. Does it drive nice?
6. Do I look retarded in it?
Here’s the testing schedule:
Friday @ 10am - The Nissan Versa
Saturday @ 9am - The Toyota Yaris
Saturday @ 10am - The Hyundai Accent
Saturday @ 11:15am - The Honda Fit
Sunday @ 11am - The Suzuki SX4
Sunday @ 1pm - the Volkswagen City Golf
I’ll post my reviews of the first four on Saturday evening and my reviews of the last two on Sunday evening. By next Friday, I’ll probably have decided which one to lease for my business and I’ll let you know why.
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Aaron “Crooky” Cruikshank is the Principal and Founder of Friuch Consulting. He has written professionally about science and technology.
Topics: Business of Consulting, Cars | 2 Comments »
Four Ways A Research Coach Can Help Your Business
By crooky | May 14, 2008
I’ve recently started a new avenue of my consulting practice - research coaching. I can’t take credit for the idea because to be honest, my client coined the idea. At a meeting where I was proposing a normal research project, it became clear that the available funds for the project had shrunk by as much as 70% - the client could no longer afford a normal research and analytics package (normally valued at between $15-30K). I really, really like this client and they weren’t scared of getting their hands dirty so I offered them an alternative off the top of my head. My proposal:
- They do as much of the legwork on the research as possible
- I design the research and advise them on implementation
- They can use my specialized subscription tools
- I will walk them through the analysis process and give them my opinion on the research outcomes
Here’s why this is a good arrangement for them:
1. Cost
Hiring someone like me as a Research Coach helps cut the up-front cash costs by as much as 75%. There’s a caveat here though - when someone hires me to produce a complete research package, 95% of what I bill them for is my time. When you take on a Research Coach and agree to do the bulk of the legwork on a research project, you’re spending your own time - whatever that is worth.
The client that just retained my services as a Research Coach is bootstrapping their business and has already done some pre-research so they’re keen to get their hands dirty to ensure the success of their business. This is a great approach.
2. Business Intelligence
There are many advantages to writing your own business plan, doing your own market research and doing your own lead generation. The biggest advantage is the fact that you get to know your business inside and out. It’s sad when you go to a Venture Capital forum and you see some drop-in CEO giving their business pitch when he clearly only understands their core business at a theoretical level.
You need to be able to answer curveball questions that come up when you’re defending your business ideas. People are going to ask questions about the assumptions that you’ve used to come up with your revenue projections or your total addresable market. If you’ve done most of your own market research, you’re going to have these numbers ready in your head.
3. New Skills
The skills you’ll pick up while learning how to do market research will help you in other aspects of your life and business. Market research skills are valuable in policy work (if you end up in a regulated industry). They’re also handy when you want to explore new market opportunities as your business takes off or there’s a change in the market.
4. Street Cred
Doing your own market reseach will earn you a lot of respect amongst your peers - it’s hard work. A lot of your entrepreneur peers have gone through this themselves and in some cases, without the help of a Research Coach. Doing your own market research = instant entrepreneur street cred. Give it a shot!!
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Aaron “Crooky” Cruikshank is the Principal and Founder of Friuch Consulting. He has written professionally about science and technology.
Topics: Research Methodologies | No Comments »
The Complicated Biofuels Proposition
By crooky | May 13, 2008
Back in February, I wrote about a New York Times story that basically heralded the death of biofuels as an alternative to gasoline. I want to follow up that post with new information that comes from another newspaper - but one from the West Coast this time. On May 3, the Seattle Post-Intelligencer ran this story on biofuels. In that story was this great chart (see below) that lays out some great metrics on bio-based ethanol made from corn, sugar cane, grass, soy and algae, amongst other things. The moral of the story is that biofuels might not be dead and gone yet but that we must weigh the tradeoffs very carefully if we’re to replace gasoline with any of these technologies.
(click on chart for bigger, easier to read version)
In this context, it appears that there is plenty of room for innovation in the following ares:
1. Water
If we can make more efficient use of water for agricultural uses, we can start to reduce some of the negative impacts noted on this table. There are already technologies being developed but, as I’ve insinuated in another post , water is going to be the next GHG on the public’s radar in coming years.
2. Energy
This article definitely has an American flavour to it (tastes like freedom and tobacco) so the energy metric looks different than it would in countries like Canada where coal and other dirty power sources are not so heavily used. However, their point is valid - the more power we use for crops that are turned into biofuels - the more GHGs we’re potentially releasing into the atmosphere.
Even in places like BC - where we have clean Hydroelectricity - when we run out of capacity, we buy power from jurisdictions that burn natural gas and/or coal to generate power.
3. Fertilizer/Pesticide
This is a dodgy area. It seems like every innovation we make in pesticides and fertilizers, we just seem to make things worse. Genetically-modified crops that need less fertilizer and pesticide are not popular (for valid reasons) and there are chemical solutions but these have big impacts on the groundwater table which takes us back to point 1.
So, I take back what I said about biofuels with the caveat that they’re still deader than Elvis unless we can solve some of the problems I’ve highlighted above.
(credit to Treehugger for flagging this great article)
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Aaron “Crooky” Cruikshank is the Principal and Founder of Friuch Consulting. He has written professionally about science and technology for ten years.
Topics: Cars, Policy, Technology | No Comments »
From Russia With Hate
By crooky | May 12, 2008
I normally write about science and technology on Monday mornings. This week, I’m going to bump my science and tech slot to Tuesday in favour of something that inflames my passion to an even greater degree - hate crimes. The following video won both a 2008 Webby Film and Video nomination and a Webby People’s Voice Awards nomination. It’s a very high quality journalistic piece exposing the meteoric rise of National Socialism in Russia. If you have time to watch it, it’s well worth the 20 minutes:
I have a lot of reasons to be angry about these kinds of movements:
1. My wife (who is Punjabi) and my children (who are half Punjabi) have and will be victims of racial hatred in their lifetime. I grieve that they will have to suffer this injustice.
2. I have seen the rise of National Socialism in my own Province. The interior of British Columbia is a hotbed for groups much like the one shown in this mini-documentary. As someone who used to be in a Ska band in Vancouver, I saw a lot of skinheads and neo-nazis because they like Ska music. I was always sickened at their presence - the way they always picked a fight at our shows and roughed people up.
3. I am half-German. My biological grandfather served in the German army during WWII. I look German (except for the red beard). My own family teases me sometimes by calling me “hitler” or a “nazi”. I think people are afraid of me sometimes because I have short hair (it’s not because I like that style - I just have bad hair and short is the least awkward hairdo I can manage). I do not support national socialism, hate crimes, racism or any other kind of action/sentiment associated with these movements and the insinuation hurts me deeply.
I fear that in my lifetime, I will see another world conflict that is based on ethnic distinctions. The sentiments like those in Russia are an ugly undercurrent in many Western nations - including Canada. Just keep your eyes open and make sure you don’t let these people ruin our world undeterred.
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Aaron “Crooky” Cruikshank is the Principal and Founder of Friuch Consulting. He has written professionally about science and technology for ten years.
Topics: social issues | No Comments »
The Eightfold Path to Consulting Bliss
By crooky | May 9, 2008
This article might ring a little false after my antics earlier this week:
“Wah wah wah! I’m a consultant, not a wage slave! I can drop the F-bomb on my blog if I want! Wah wah wah!”
I want to take a step back though because all of these shenanigans have caused me to reflect on my own attitude towards my work. A good friend of mine recently asked me what pulled me towards consulting and I corrected her and said “I know what pushed me into consulting”.
For years, I’ve thought of my transformation into consultant as something that was thrust upon me, not chosen. At the same time, my recent flirting with the RCMP has taught me: even when a great job opportunity is presented to me, I can’t turn away from the path I’m on. I’m a consultant for better or for worse.
In this post, I want to explore the Eightfold Path to Consulting Bliss:
1. F*ck The World
Very few consultants start out as consultants. I’d argue that if you’ve never had a job before, you can’t do a very good job of working for people with jobs. You need to understand their reality in addition to bringing in outside perspective. So I am comfortable with assuming that most consultants out there left a job/career before leaping into self-employment.
There is no sweeter feeling in the world that walking out of that office that has been a boot on your neck for the past X years, grinning from ear to ear as your co-workers pat you on the back, glare daggers or generally look sympathetic because they think you’re making a mistake.
You don’t care! The world is your oyster and you’re going to crack that baby open and gorge on it. (I had a more graphic analogy involving crustaceans. Be grateful that I spared you.) For the first few months, you look down on your fellow man who watches the clock, punches time cards and metes out their life in 1 hour increments for a pension and a dental plan.
2. Failure
Every consultant has a rough start. It might be three weeks in, it might be three months in or it might be three quarters in. At some point, the blush is going to wear off and instead of “fuck the world”, you’re going to be thinking “what the fuck have I done?” The bills are piling up, customers aren’t biting and your spouse/significant other/parent is starting to be a little less subdued about their doubt in your ability to win bread.
It’s okay. This happens to most people. The normal response is to re-evaluate your decision. Re-look at your business plan (or, in my case, start thinking about writing a business plan), looking for a new job, etc… This leads us to:
3. Retreat
The pressure is going to get too high at some point. You’re going to crack and you might even try to go running back to your old job with your tail between your legs. Trust me, this is not the worst thing that can happen. Falling on your face and trying to retreat into your old life is going to teach you something very, very important - you can’t go back.
Your old job isn’t as easy as you remember. It’s more confining than you remember. The people you work with smell worse than you remember. It’s like going back to dial-up internet after having broadband for a year.
4. Re-inforcement
Once you’ve put that ridiculous retreat phase behind you, you’ll be thinking one thing: “Oh man. That sucked. I never want to go through that again.” This is the tipping point for you as a consultant or freelancer - it’s go big or go home. At this stage, you start investing in marketing collateral for your business. You might incorporate or register a business name. You get proper business cards printed and maybe even a web site.
You start networking and pressing the flesh and winning new clients the hard way. This is the stage in which you pay your dues. It’s hard work and you won’t get rich overnight but with a couple of years of perseverence, you’ll be doing well.
5. Resignation
You might start to slip back into stage three again after the inevitable “famine” phases. By now, you’ve started re-inforcing your consulting career and you’ve started making market rates for your work. You’ll come to the conclusion that it’s not only emotionally impossible for you to go back but it’s financially irresponsible to do so as well.
You’re now a full-fledged consultant, at least on paper. This realization, combined with some success will lead you to:
6. Overconfidence
Ah, the old “fuck the world” stage - how I missed thee. What’s that? You’re back?? YES! At some stage, you’re going to be doing so well that you’ve got less experienced consultants coming to you for advice about consulting, clients are banging on your doors, you have to start thinking about hiring help. You’ve arrived.
This is where it can all go sideways. You’re going to get too cocky. You’ll start over-commiting and under-delivering. Your quality of service will suffer and your old standby clients whom you consider friends may start to give you the cold shoulder. Oh oh.
7. Recognition
It’s not too late to save your consulting soul. You just need to get a grip and realize that you’ve come a long ways but you haven’t done so on your own. There’s the contributions of your spouse/significant other/assorted loved ones to consider. They’ve sacrificed so you can soar. There’s your loyal clients. Do you think they were 100% confident in your abilities when they hired you the first time? Hell no. They took a chance. Don’t forget that.
Also don’t forget your super-networker friends who have constantly and consistently thought of ways to support your business through unpaid lead generation and word of mouth marketing over the years - you couldn’t have done it without them. Humble theyself.
8. Acquiescense
Once you’ve been through your naivity, your failures, your successes and survived your own ego, you can embrace the true meaning of being a consultant. You are only as good as the relationships you nurture. Without them, you might as well be selling used cars. Your role in this world is part of a larger web of relationships and economies.
Once you can recognize that and brush that chip off your shoulder, you’ll move into a new reality - one where your clients love you, people want to be near you and business is good.
Consulting is a good career for the right person. If you can’t go down this path and keep the faith - you might not be cut out for the job.
I’d like to wrap this post up with a great Robot Chicken clip about a giraffe stuck in quicksand going through a similar trial - just on a shorter timeline.
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Aaron “Crooky” Cruikshank is the Principal and Founder of Friuch Consulting. He has written professionally about science and technology for ten years.
Topics: Business of Consulting, Levity | No Comments »
The Tone and Flavour Of This Blog
By crooky | May 8, 2008
Unbenowst to me until the hate mail started to flow in, my friend Garth at Jigsaw included a link to my review of Jigsaw in his latest customer newsletter which goes out to (according to Garth) 200,000 some-odd people. While the resulting traffic spike is flattering, I thought I should take a moment to address some of the concerns of my newfound readers.
1. This is a non-monetized blog.
I don’t get paid by anyone to write what I write on this blog. That includes any reviews of services like LinkedIn or Jigsaw. They’re unsolicited reviews that I write to help my friends and colleagues get to know these tools better.
Let me make the following point clear to those of you reading my site that are appalled that Jigsaw would “allow” me to write such “garbage”: as much as I like and respect the guys at Jigsaw, they have absolutely no say over what I write. They did not pay me to write the review. Why would they “allow” a glowing, enthusiastic, unsolicited review of their product? Hmmmm… you figure it out, genius.
If you’re not familiar with the way the blogosphere works, this piece of the Internet is mine. As long as I don’t step into the realm of libel, I can say anything I want. My regular readers (all 35 of them) appreciate my tone and the time that I put into writing new content for them 3+ times a week. If you don’t appreciate it, by all means, write your congressman.
2. My Tone
I have made no secret about my non-conformist ways over the years. I am a square peg to your round hole (that sounds bad but you get the idea). The very qualities that made me an unpopular salaried employee make me an excellent consultant. I don’t mince words with my clients. I don’t blow smoke up anyone’s ass. If they were looking for someone to sit around, looking pretty and agreeing with everything they have to say, there are legions of salaried yesmen (sorry… yesPEOPLE) out there to draw upon.
My blog, like my business, is an unabashed look at the world the way it is, not the way we want it to be. I had a meeting with a new client just yesterday who had lost some government funding to do a market assessment for their business. The other consultant they had talked to seemed un-enthusiastic to work with them now that their grant had dried up. I told these clients that they shouldn’t let lack of the grant money stop them from doing market research. I directed them to my blog and the many posts that I’ve written on market research methodologies and suggested that they could bootstrap their research needs.
That’s what my business is about. I’ll do a project for you if you need me but if you don’t need me, I’m happy to give you the information you need to move forward without me. The blog has the same philosophy. You can take what you need from my blog and if at some point, you want to do business with me, great. If not, that’s fine too.
For every negative comment I received yesterday, I received three positive e-mails and comments. I’ve received some invitations to connect via LinkedIn and I hope some of these connections will lead to new business.
So I put the question back to my detractors:
Yes, I use “profanities” sometimes on my blog but as a result, I’ve gotten a huge traffic spike on my site and lots of invitations to connect with new people. Am I crazy or crazy like a fox?
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Aaron “Crooky” Cruikshank is the Principal and Founder of Friuch Consulting. He has written professionally about science and technology for ten years.
Topics: Uncategorized | 3 Comments »
Would You Drive the New Volkswagen 1L?
By crooky | May 7, 2008
I know that I normally write about research methodologies on Wednesdays but to be frank, I’m running out of ideas for that category and most of my readers seem to be more interested in the technology and business topics I write about. This week, I want to talk about something that captured my attention: the Volkswagen 1L.
This concept car, originally developed in 2002, looks like someone cut the cockpit out of a 1970s era jet fighter and stuck some wheels on it. That’s cool with me. The name 1L comes from the fact that this car is designed to consume only 1 litre of fuel for every 100km driven. For you heathens that still measure in miles and gallons - 235 MPG. WHAT???? Yes. That’s almost five times as fuel efficient as the Toyota Prius.
The good news is this car is set to hit the market in 2010 (which may mean we see these cars in dealerships as early as September, 2009). How does this car get 235 MPG? It’s got a drag coefficient that’s half that of a normal car. This means that it’s wasting a lot less energy pushing the car through the air. It’s light - carbon fibre construction and it eschews paint to keep the weight down. It’s also tiny. It will have a 500cc, 1 cylinder diesel engine and seats two people - one in front of the other.
The size and shape of this vehicle has a few implications:
1. It’s not going to be the best car in a crash. They have computer simulations that say this car will do “okay” but it’s not going to be as safe as a Volvo.
2. It’s going to look cool/goofy (depending on your perspective)
3. It’s probably going to be classified as a motorcycle for insurance purposes so you’ll be able to drive it in the HOV lane with only one passenger.
235 MPG sounds really great but the real question is - who’s going to buy it? I’ve been shopping around for a second car lately. My business is doing well and my with our third child on the way, my wife wants the car available more often during the day to ferry our numerous and beligerent offspring around. I’ve been looking at the Toyta Yaris which gets gas mileage just shy of the Prius but isn’t a hybrid. While the Yaris is a bit goofy looking, I’d still drive it. Is it much of a stretch to say that I would drive the 1L? Not really, as long as I could wear one of these:
The… uh. The hat. Yes. The hat. What was I talking about? The 1L! Right! So, would you drive one? Take the poll:
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Aaron “Crooky” Cruikshank is the Principal and Founder of Friuch Consulting. He has written professionally about science and technology for ten years.
Topics: Cars, Technology | 3 Comments »
CERN Update: Large Hadron Collider Still Set to Fire Up In June, Possibly Destroy Earth
By crooky | May 5, 2008
I wrote about the CERN Large Hadron Collider earlier this year and suggested that it may create some unexpected and dire consequences for Earth. Since then, anyone concerned about the LHC has been decried as a “nutjob” because the scientists at CERN have declared that it’s safe! An independent study by Sir Martin Rees has concluded that the odds of the CERN LHC destroying the planet is a one in fifty million chance. Other scientists liken the chances of “strangelets” escaping the facility and destroying the planet as likely as “winning the major prize on the lottery 3 weeks in succession.”
I think the main problem is that a one in 50 million chance isn’t that big in the cosmic scale of things. There’s the additional problem that an accurate assessment of these risks is near impossible due to an incomplete and hypothetically flawed model of particle physics.
While I’m not planning on changing any of my short-term plans, I think it’s good to be aware of the risks. I lack the resources and scientific background to stop this project if I wished to and it’s not like building a bunker and filling it with sterilized canned goods will save me. I’m going to hold off buying RRSPs until this thing fires up and is running for a while.
Let’s talk about this issue - have much responsibility do we, as citizens have to put the brakes on a project when we feel that our governments are moving too fast down a line of inquiry? What if we’re not satisfied with the precautions taken?
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Aaron “Crooky” Cruikshank is the Principal and Founder of Friuch Consulting. He has written professionally about science and technology for ten years.
Topics: Technology | 6 Comments »
Ten Reasons Why Having A Salaried Job Rocks!
By crooky | May 2, 2008
Every now and again, it’s important for us self-employed folks to take a look back at our former lives as wage slaves and remind ourselves of the good times that drove us into our current situation. Here’s my ten reasons why having a salaried job rocks:
10. Colds/Flus
When you work from the comfort of your own home, you have a very limited pool of people from which you can contract disease. Your kids, your spouse and occasionally, your pets. At work, there is a veritable cornicopia of people that will hack, cough and do their level best to infect you with something. Extra bonus points for re-circulating air-conditioning systems which have the ability to spread a chest cold from that engineer on the third floor to the entire building.
9. Gossip/Drama
I put this as #9 but in truth, this is the part I miss the most. The Jerry Springer show just doesn’t have that level of realism that finding your co-workers slumped over their desk drunk/despondent/crying has. On Springer, when it turns out that so and so has been secretly fucking whats-her-face all these years and the audience goes “OOOOooooooh”, I say “meh”. I don’t actually know these people.
At work, there’s a good chance that you will know someone who has an extramarital affair with a co-worker. With any luck, they’ll have the aforementioned affair on your desk to spite you somehow. Extra bonus points when they corner you in the washroom to confide the daliance.
8. Cubicles
I love cubicles. Smaller than a jail cell and you spend more time in one than you would spend in the clink for killing someone. The colours that cubicles come in are so soothing and inspiring - beige, dusty blue, rose, cholesterol yellow. My home office, painted in a vibrant blue colour, featuring artwork that I enjoy and windows that open is a pale comparison. It’s also about six times as big as my old cubicle. Extra bonus points for the fact that the most innovative thing you’re allowed to do with your cubicle is put up your kids’ crappy art.
7. Cafeteria Food
The unspoken tension between cafeteria workers and the people they serve lunch to - many of whom make no less than five times what they do on an hourly basis - is intoxicating. Will they spit in my food today? What corners has the management company cut to keep their costs down? Extra bonus points for the passive-aggressive “healthy choices” posters that litter office cafeterias while 90% of what’s on the menu contains an entire day’s worth of calories, sodium and saturated fat.
6. Work-Life Balance
I wish I still had the work-life balance that I did when I was a salaryman. It was true flexibility - I was free to work whenever was convenient for me. On the weekends, late at night, while I was on my lunch break, while I was spending time with my kids, while I was on vacation. I mean, sure. I work more hours as a consultant but is double the take-home pay really enough to justify having to take time off whenever you feel like it? To eat lunch with your kids? Extra bonus points for being given homework on your vacation.
5. The IT Department
Oh god, I miss the days when I could call up the IT department because something went sideways in Windows XP (which we just upgraded to in 2007) and I could easily fix if it wasn’t for the admin lock-down on any system settings. I’m sure I can do without a working mouse for the next 72 hours until my job ticket comes to the top of the pile. These days, I have to learn how to fix my own computer and choose not only what kind of computer I am going to use (stressful and not fun) but what software to run! Extra bonus points for the fact that the IT department monitors your every move. I should install a key-logger on my home computer and mail it to the RCMP once a month - just to keep me on my toes.
4. Dress Code
I really miss wearing a budget suit from Moores to work every day. I mean, who doesn’t want to wear a suit every day? They’re so comfortable. Just because I can literally work in my pajamas now doesn’t mean that I don’t break out the wool suit every now and again just to remember what it feels like to be free. I also miss the wild mis-interpretations of dress code by young women at the office and the subsequent “talking to” that they get. Good times. Extra bonus points for “dressing for the job you want, not the job you have.”
3. Your Co-Workers
The dynamics of a team - always trying to stab each other in the back or glean some piece of personal information that they can file away and use against you at a later date. This is the stuff that greatness is made of. These days, I am forced to pick and choose who I work with and if someone is an anti-social prick, I can just not work with them anymore. I miss the challenge. Extra bonus points for when your co-workers merge into office drama territory.
2. Your Boss
I miss the days when I had someone whose sole purpose in life is to get the best possible results out of me. The coaching, the gentle pursuasion, the mentoring - all of those things I now have to seek on my own from people that I like. Even worse, I’m forced to seek advice and mentorship from people who actually know more than I do. It sucks, let me tell you. All that time I spend listening to and learning from highly intelligent, engaging individuals - every minute is another knife in my heart. Extra bonus points for the boss that is parachuted in on a patronage appointment.
1. The Job
The absolute best part about a job is being able to define yourself by a title. What am I now? I used to be a coordinator, a manager, an analyst - that meant something. It meant that my opinion was heard when it was appropriate for it to be heard and that I could only socialize with people of a similar title. It defined a domain for me. I miss that. These days, I’m forced to work on a variety of projects that may challenge me intellectually and stretch my skills. It’s hell, man. Extra bonus points for the fact that you can get fired for no reason from a job while as a consultant, you have to work a lot harder to get fired from every project you’re on simultaneously.
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Aaron “Crooky” Cruikshank is the Principal and Founder of Friuch Consulting. He has written professionally about science and technology for ten years.
Topics: Business of Consulting, Levity | 2 Comments »
Today is RSS Awareness Day
By crooky | May 1, 2008
I’ve had a couple of my regular readers ask me in the past few months how they can subscribe to my blog. I invariably tell them “just subscribe to my RSS feed”. This is usually met with some confusion. I’ve been using RSS feeds since Firefox came along but I hadn’t realized that less than 6% of Internet users use RSS feeds to track their favourite news sites and blogs.
In honour of RSS Awareness Day, I’ve added a big, bold RSS link to the sidebar of my blog. If you click on that, it will get you started on tracking my blog via RSS. If you’ve never seen how an RSS feed works, click on the RSS Awareness Day banner above. They’ve got some great tips and the following video:
Good advice, annoying voice. In a nutshell, RSS at its most simple level lets you add a menu button to your web browser for my blog and when you click on it, it pulls down the last 10 or so titles of blog postings that I’ve written. Click on one of those titles and you’re at the story. It really saves time and keeps you abreast of everything that’s going on.
If you follow dozens or hundreds of blogs (like that editor from Slashdot at Penny Arcade Expo last year), an RSS Reader might be your answer. I use Google Reader but there are others out there.
If you’re not already subscribed to Digg’s daily news feed, I highly recommend it. That’s how I found out that today is RSS Awareness Day!
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Aaron “Crooky” Cruikshank is the Principal and Founder of Friuch Consulting. He has written professionally about science and technology for ten years.
Topics: Uncategorized | No Comments »
